How to improve your kick drums and give them more weight:

1) Take two portabello mushrooms. Fry the bottom gently.
2) Place in an oven tray. Add three different cheeses in a pretty pattern. Cook under the grill for 5-7 minutes.
3) Sample your kick drums from tunes that have been professionally mixed and mastered.
4) Eat mushrooms while listening to your amazing fat new kick!